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I guess your first decision is about how much the relationship means to you. I would suspect you value your relationship because you went 4yrs without any sex before marrying her. But you need to decide what you are willing to endure for the relationship. If you decide she is worth it then you need to keep at it. There are things that can effect libido. People have kinda a natural level that their libido sits at, some are higher than others. Then there are outside type effects. They could be due to medications, stress, past experiences, interpretation of current experiences, biology, trauma both mental or physical. There are reasons. But also you have issue with talking. If she doesn't want to engage the subject at all it becomes very difficult to do much. I spent a decade with far less sex than I would like. I was rather unhappy about it for those years. But it wasn't as bad as yours sounds, I don't think I could have gone without for years. Regardless one important point was when we both realized that our problems with sex could destroy our relationship whether we want it to or not. I think you need to come clean, I think you need to tell her exactly how much this is bothering you. You need to say you are considering cheating. Express your position and the gravity of the situation. She not understand but you need to try, it take times. My wife doesn't really get what it is like to be sexually deprived, she is understanding more now. But she doesn't feel the same way after not having sex for a while. Next medical issues not be the root cause. Medicine can help but it won't usually overwhelm other issues, it just gives a little extra push in the right direction. I would suspect that there is an issue with either your relationship and means of interacting in regards to sex or that she has a past up about it. Sweet wives want love asian women looking for men
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